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Late Nite Adobo

Typing out thoughts on a website… when the cravings hit you in the late nite…

by Bananaketchup

What just makes that little darn ant, think he could move a rubber tree plant? Umm…My guess would be to avoid being lightly salted, toasted, and made into a Columbian snack. 

From the creators of such delicacies as Canned Unicorn Meat, the wizards at Think Geek give us Edible Giant Toasted Leafcutter Ants. Doing my best Andrew Zimmern impression (short of shaving my head bald), I dive into the wonderful world of bizarre foods.

For some reason, I was anticipating a big mason jar full of ants, suitable for wannabe Pokemon trainers of all ages. The jar is pretty small, with maybe 15-20 ants per freshness-sealed container.

 

These leafcutter ants are definitely not your everyday, generic army ants that invade your grandma’s kitchen craving pie. Each individual ant is HUGE and intimidating. Before munching down on one, I had one of those “What am I doing with my life?” moments of existentialism.

Thankfully (or unthankfully if you’re into insect-flavored Gushers), the abdomen section didn’t explode in my mouth with ant guts when I bit into one, as I feared. The texture is crispy and somewhat chewy. The ants indeed have a nutty, smokey, bacon-like flavor. If I did a blind taste test, I would probably guess they were krill shrimp cooked with bacon salt, but then again there’s a lingering aftertaste that screams “cree-ee-ee-py crawler!”

Even though I would go as far to say that the taste was actually good, I just can’t picture eating handfulls of ants as a snack on movie night. That would make a midnight screening of Never Say Never even more awkward than it should be. Half the battle is getting over that little voice in your head telling you that you’re eatting a bug that once happily roamed the earth, collecting leaves that were probably used to build a summer vacation home for his tiny ant family. Poor poor Timmy the Ant.

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